We had been together roughly 5 months when things started getting stormy. I got anxious and nervous about things being so serious when I was only 16 years old. We had been talking about marriage already and I was both thrilled with the idea and terrified at the same time. I was not sure I was completely ready to settle down. I knew I loved Mr. Wonderful and I wanted to spend my life with someone like him but I also was not sure I was done with my teen years and doing fun and wild stuff.
I broke his heart, I told him how I was feeling and that we needed a break, that things were getting too serious and I was only 16 and needed a little space. Of course all this time I was the one to make it more serious I mean talk about indecisive! That was not the only reason, there was another boy showing me interest and I missed that new love type attention. I explored the idea of dating someone else, but it never really happened. I missed Mr. Wonderful, I still had not been able to break the habit of calling him to talk, he was my best friend. So I started trying to repair our relationship as best I could after I had been so selfish.
We had been broken up almost a month. During our break-up he still treated me with respect and he even gave me a sweet B-Day card about always being friends and that he still cherished our friendship. I think that was one of the turning points for me, to know that he still cared about me deeply even though I had hurt him. It took a while to build back the trust and we were pretty much only friends for over a month after we decided to try it again. It took a while for me to be ready as well, since part of the reason for the breakup had been for space because things had been moving along fairly fast. So we slowly worked our way back to each other and learned about trust and commitment. Soon our relationship had grown to be even better than before. We had a deeper relationship now and we were stronger and happier than before. It was like we had passed a test or a major bump in the road and he and I both proved we had what it took to make it work. One of the neat times we experienced in our journey back was that we had been out to dinner eating chinese food and we got our fortune cookies and here is what mine said: "Stop searching forever. Happiness is sitting next to you." It was like a 2x4 to the head, I realized it was right, he was everything I ever wanted and needed!
We also knew that lust is what had really started to ruin our relationship. After we got back together we decided to hold off on that part of our relationship and focus on doing things together as a couple but not focusing so much on each other and our attraction to one another. It was important to get our minds on something else and learn to be friends moreso than worrying about anything more even if our relationship before would have looked innocent to most people in our situation. We maintained our decision for about 6 months.....until I dared him that he could not resist me, ya don't even dare a man they can't resist you when you both have been fighting temptation for over 6 months.......turns out I won the dare and our hiatus from serious make-outs was over. See? I was such a bad influence!
2 comments:
Isn't it funny how we get what we want (dating Mr. Wonderful) and then we question if it's really what we want? Glad you figured out it was a good thing.
And such restraint! To hold back for even six months is commendable, IMHO.
:-)
Ya I often wonder why that is that I had everything I dreamed of and still I questioned it, I think it kinda goes back to movies and soap operas where you think things are supposed to be a certain way and that is realistic.
The restraint period for 6 months probably was the only thing that made it possible for us to truely rebuild our relationship. It brought back the excitement in a real way as far as anticipation and desire for a true friendship first. It was probably the best thing we ever did for our long term success. Or at least I am guessing.....not that it was ever easy to wait for that long after already being there before. THAT was hard. But again I was such a bad influence since both in the beginning and at the end of our hiatus I was the one who initiated it. I was so naughty. Sometimes I wish I had been a different person back then, now that I am older and wiser, but that is some of the things that MADE me older and wiser. Poor Mr Wonderful was so innocent, he is now corrupted. Hee Hee
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